Recently, The Woodstocker introduced a new advice column! Every month we send out a google form where students and staff can submit questions about school, life, relationships, dorms and everything in between and we publish an article with advice specially and collectively curated by the Woodstocker team. Below is the question and answer from August.
How does someone deal with not being included in their friend group?
Firstly, it’s happened to all of us. I don’t know one person who hasn’t struggled with feeling left out and it’s not something to be ashamed of. Being excluded is not always personal, and sometimes people make others feel left out without even realizing it. Remember that communication is key. A lot of problems can be solved with a conversation. Talk to your friends if you think they don’t realize how their actions are affecting you. If it only happens rarely, and you don’t think it’s on purpose, try to get some perspective. You’re always going to be missing out on something, so try staying in the moment and enjoying exactly where you are and who you are with. Especially at Woodstock, where there’s always something going on, it’s easy to be caught up in FOMO (Fear of Missing Out). However, if you find yourself always feeling excluded purposefully, it might be time to surround yourself with different people. At Woodstock, your friends are like your family. You live with them, eat with them, go to school with them. They should make you feel valued and respected. You can’t let being excluded affect your self-worth and make you feel bad about yourself. Just remember that it’s not about you, it’s about them. It’s okay to feel sad and lonely, but it’s not okay to let yourself be treated badly.
Eliza is a staff reporter.